I'm not going to write about Spain, because it breaks my heart coming home again.
(Except to say thanks to Em and the Curve for their company and for taking us to Salamanca (?) in Barceloneta for the finest seafood paella known to man. This weekend went cava-food-cava-food-cava-food-fine-wine-food, and now I'm back to school, and let me tell you it's even worse when you're an adult. )
No, what is really worse about coming back is my utterly PATHETIC and SHAMEFUL lack of willpower. Finished the last of my tobacco whilst away and said, that was the last one. How long has it taken before I had to run to the smoky pub next door and raid their cigarette machine? 2 hours after getting home.
I hate smoking, and want to stop, I've done it before - for more than a year - and all this seems to have done is re-doubled the addiction. Like I'm smoking more to make up for it. It's like in Trainspotting, they come off heroin and have cold turkey and all that, but afterwards they're still merrily lighting up their cigarettes, so they still haven't managed to kick the nicotine.
Bah, I'm a pathetic drug addict.
15 comments:
Annie,
Welcome back. Nice photo. Been away to Spain, and returned! Impressive. Must have taken some will power. Kicking the smoke should be easy compared to leaving Barcelona.
I stopped smoking in 1983 when my mate Phil was sent to prison. We were both students and I smoked his rolies, until he went to prison that is. Maybe what you need is for a friend to be given a long prison sentence. It certainly worked for me.
Annie, please come back when you have finished your O levels in the summer; or maybe you could take a break from revision at Easter?
Smoking is a bitch. You just need to focus. and really want. Or do what i did and trick yourself.
I've quit last May and still sometimes I feel like have a smoke. But my trick was not to quit completely, from time to time I allowed myself a smoke (still do) at a party or something like that. After some time it started tasting awful. By now the taste really is not worth it and even when I feel like smoking the idea of that terrible taste is enough to put me off.
BTW, GH's trick: create your own "designated smoking area". Preferably some place not very cosy. Smoke nowhere else. After some time you are smoking a lot less and it is easier to quit.
I gave up nearly three years ago now. I have had the occasional wobble when I've been mega stressed out but I've (so far) avoided getting hooked again. A lot of it is down to the taste. If you stop for a long time and then have one you come to the conclusion that the flavour you savoured is somewhat akin to arse!
I still miss it though. I don't look anywhere near as cool or grown up as I used to when I smoked. ;)
I went from 40 a day to zero in a heartbeat -- literally. I had a heart attack in the office just after lighting up one morning and as few weeks later became the proud owner of three new arteries.
I put the fags in my desk drawer before they carried me out on a stretcher. And I never had another. Motivation is the key.
I can't speak for others, but my own addiction was purely psychological. I suffered no physical symptoms at all. The craving came back after a good dinner or a cup of coffee, but I resisted until it went away.
Have another go, but first spell out to yourself the compelling reasons to quit. Good luck.
Maybe the first step is to cut down initially, rather than shock the system by totally stopping.
That way you need the will power to miss out one before rewarding yourself with the one you would've had later etc. etc.
Annie - Barcelona is in mourning since you left at the weekend. Today we've had thunder, lightning and pissing down rain. Please come back and make the sun shine......
Firstly, well done all you ex-smokers, you put me to shame.
Dan, it's the kind of drastic solution that just might work. I'll ask them, though they might not. Selfish bastards.
Ah, the Curve. If only I was 16 again. But still get school holidays at least, so will definitely see you in the summer.
Adrian, I'm going to try it. I'll smoke tomorrow...
Well done Dcver. This doesn't work for me, it was the slippery slope that led back to full-time addiction. Maybe I should do what GH does and go outside, it's cold enough to put you off at the moment.
I missed you too G. I forgot our deal, we have a date, we'll come back all fragrant and with skin that looks 10 years younger.
Rad, that's my downfall too (and what led to it in the first place). All the cool kids do it - at college there was the smokers' side of the cafe and the non-smokers, you knew where all your friends would be.
Oy vey, Dave F. That puts it in perspective. And well done for stopping. It is psychological, I'm with you there. I didn't find it difficult to stop last time, no physical withdrawal for me either. I'm just stupid. *Hits head on desk*
Greavsie, are you a smoker? Reward youself with a fag for not having had a fag - that's nicotine logic for you.
Growing Up, you deserve a medal for living with a cranky ex-smoker. Don't start now will you?
Em, sorry about the rain. Wish I could say I brought the sun back here with me but it was snowing today. I'll have a word with the weather gods...
You love Spain, don't you? Didn't you live there once? I think you said you did.
I've never smoked. For some reason I think I'll choke to death if I do. I'm asthmatic. Breathing is more fun :-)
I do love it, GG. When I win the lottery I'm moving back there ;-)
You're very wise. I had an asthmatic friend who wouldn't have plants in her bedroom "because they're bad for asthma". I asked if they were worse than the 20 cigarettes she smoked a day...
Hey Annie...lovely spending time with u and la ladeez this weekend. I gave up the fags out of pure vanity. Do you want your mouth to look like a cat's arse when you get older? My bruised knee is now yellow and green. A lesson to be learnt there. Never try to demonstrate the grapevine in hiking socks on a polished wooden floor after drinking 2 bottles of wine. Leese xx
You too Lees. Ha ha ha, LMAO (as I believe they say). Sorry about your bruised knee, but it was a genuine comedy moment. What is the grapevine now? Never got to find out.
I aim to amuse :). The grapevine is move one does in a aerobics class. You traverse the floor by putting one leg behind the other whilst flapping your arms up and down. It looks very elegant, as I demonstrated. Gut S'Jabbles Dolly xx
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