You heard it here first - Britney is the new Elvis. No, don't laugh - she is a popular heroine who made it from poor white trash background to become the nation's darling, and her success has clearly messed with her mind.
(I once saw a fascinating programme on the King's diet - when he became rich and successful beyond his wildest dreams of avarice, his idea of luxury was to get on his private jet and fly, not to some high-class Manhattan restaurant, but to the nearest fast food joint and buy every king-size burger in the place. Because when he was growing up and living on deep-fried squirrels and grits (whatever they may be), a hamburger seemed like the heighth of decadence. In a similar spirit, Britney and the despicable K-Fed's wedding featured little mini hamburgers and fries. And they wore matching pink velour Juicy Couture tracksuits too. Probably.)
Oh Britney, why do I love you? In videos, she is perfection, a beautiful, sexy airbrushed teen queen.
In the tabloids, she is a mess, and there is something admirable in her refusal to live the dream 24-7. She remains true to her roots, and it is endearing. Though you do worry about her questionable taste in men. Still, all she has to do is bat those big, long-lashed, cow-like brown eyes at you, and all is forgiven.
17 comments:
I totally totally totally agree. I think Britney is excellent. Obviously we are never going to meet her, so we don´t need to get too hung up on what she is actually like. But as a media phenomenon she is hugely entertaining and I love the fact that she looks an absolute mess when she´s not on the stage - and why not? She´s a mum of two, a simple redneck gal who loves the fries and cokes - hurrah for her. I applaud her trailer trash style and my but doesn´t she scrub up well on stage. I also like her music, agree wholeheartedly about toxic. Good on her, and extra good on her for dumping the K-Fed - best move ever. Why not keep marrying fools if she wants to? She can afford it. Hurrah for Britney! I think she is a girl that the girls like - is this true?
Oo, I like the Elvis analogy. I don't know nuffink about Britney the person, but I reckon 'Baby One More Time' is possibly the best pop song ever, and for that I salute her. Well, not that she wrote it or anything, but still.
Funny... I can't stand either of them.
'Cow-like brown eyes'....she's a poet and she don't even know it... ;-)
What's not to love about Britney? She plays her boobs like accordions while dressed up as an airhostess. And then costume-changes into a diamante shroud, a biker lady and her out of Alias.
And that's just one video!
Is having eyes like a cow a good thing? Cows are dozy-looking things.
I quite like Toxic. Although you didn't hear me say that...
Em - 'a girl that the girls like' - I agree - it could be a whole post in itself that, why we like some but not others... Pammy yes, Jordan yes, Jennifer Lopez, Victoria Beckham, meh...
Patroclus, I love it that 'Baby One More Time' finds a place in your heart amidst the Norwegian bleepy music. She didn't write it, but she did choose it, and the schoolgirl uniform was her idea...
Viking - who, Britney and her ex, or Britney and Elvis? I'm not a big fan of Elvis but you can't deny they're both big icons.
Greavsie, thank you, I spent hours searching for that simile and I'm pleased you appreciated it.
Adrian - EXACTLY!
QE - maybe I could have chosen better. Um... doe-like? Fawn-like? No, it's just not the same. She has big brown eyes like a cow, a beautiful cow, but nevertheless a cow.
Your secret is safe with me...
Pull the udder one.
Sorry.
Yes, love Britney, love her music, totally would, thank you and goodnight.
By the time he died, Elvis had bigger tits than Britney.
And he never married anyone called Kevin.
Agree, I like Britney, she has a bit of a mad life, but still comes over as nice and smiley.
Can't be easy with all that money..
Toxic is entirely those strings. But what brilliant strings. I can hear them now.
Del - Good. I know male friends who abandoned Pammy, for example, once she'd had kids.
Tim, Elvis at least had good taste in choosing Priscilla - Kevin just could not compare.
Heather - I think the money possibly maybe might ease the pain...
Billy, how could you? Surely Toxic is partially our Britney's gutteral singing style...
On the Jordan note - did you know that she's Jewish?! It's true, I read it in this week's JC! (The copy that I saw at my grandparents' house - too tight to buy my own...)
C
x
No. Way. I don't believe it! But Claire, I read her autobiography and don't recall her saying she was Jewish. Much as I'd love to claim her as one of ours, is it possible the JC got it wrong?
Maybe her mother forced her into the divorce. "Why couldn't you marry a nice lawyer, or maybe a doctor?"
Jordan and Peter got divorced?! Say it ain't so...
Oh i thought you were talking about Britney. Still, give it 6 months, I'm sure I'll be right eventually.
Post a Comment