Monday, October 02, 2006

A million little pieces

So I'm sitting at the bus-stop on Bow Road, getting increasingly soaked and debating whether to make my way to the gym through the monsoon-like rain. There's three other people sitting on the bench with me. Suddenly we hear a massive bang right behind us, and I'm thanking my lucky stars that my native Londoner's stoicism ('What's-that-loud-bang-oh-probably-just-another-bomb then') means that I don't turn my head, because then we hear an even more massive cracking sound and the entire, glass bus shelter explodes. Explodes onto us. By itself.

I just got home, and as we speak I am picking shards of glass (or to be more accurate, because it was safety glass, crumbs of glass) out of my hair, legs, hands, and (most uncomfortable this) pants. Me and my fellow bus people were all standing round laughing immediately after and going "Wha-... bu-... " until the bus arrived.

I had the following conversation with the bus driver which you might find reassuring in these troubled times:

Me: That bus stop just exploded. We are covered in glass from it.
Driver: There's a number for TFL (Transport for London) on the bus stop. That's TFL, innit.
Me: Can't you let the depot know? It's a bit dangerous.
Driver: Yeh... I don't know TFL's number... I'll call when I get back.

Right.

Anyway, please excuse me while I go and have a cup of hot sweet tea.






18 comments:

Tim F said...

Ooooh... glass in pants... sure you're OK? No PTSD? I had a similar experience in Starbucks (the door fell over) and it put me off coffee for, oohh, minutes.

Surely if the TFL number was on the bus stop, and the bus stop exploded, the number would have gone as well? Or are such things beyond the comprehension of the drooling simians who drive buses these days?

WV: "nervd". And edgy geek.

Anonymous said...

My glass shower door did the same thing. Exploded for no good reason. Not in the shower at the time, but two years later I am still using a makeshift shower curtain instead because I can't think of a plausible way to explain it to the landlord.

the whales said...

Jack - for someone reason i sniggered when i read that. Tell him an implausible one then...

Annie said...

Tim, I hope you were not underneath the door when it fell over. Ooh, PTSD - yes I may put a shot of brandy in the tea - and hold the tea...

Jack, holy shit! How lucky you weren't in the shower! Yes, I see your problem with the landlord. 'It spontaneously combusted...'

Yes, the Whales. But then, how else would a glass shower door break? 'I was infuriated by my shampoo bottle claiming it would make my hair silky and more manageable and smashed it in a fit of pique' does not sound more likely.

Anonymous said...

I thought spontaneous human combustion was bad, but spontaneous bus shelter explosion is something else.
Did it look suspicious beforehand? Could it have been a suicide bus shelter?

Annie said...

Realdoc - tee hee! No, though now you come to mention it, it was muttering something about how nobody loved it, and it would show the bastards...

Anxious said...

That's just totally bizarre
How on earth...?

If you find out, do let us know...

Anonymous said...

It's obvious isn't it? Can't you see the pattern here?

Girls obviously cause glass to shatter. It's you and Jack and the rest of them. You're so hot you're causing spacial sheering and glass shatters. You're a danger to innocent pus shelters and showers.

Don't blame me when the FVI seeks you out as a weapon of terror.

Annie said...

Anx, it was very Twilight Zone.

Aw, Adrian, I thought you would give me some rational engineer-type explanation, maybe involving words like stress fracture.

Now I understand that in fact I have super-powers - if only I could harness them for the good of society...

Heather said...

Not what you need after a hard days work..

Anonymous said...

You see, going to the gym is just not advisable. It was the cosmos telling you to just go home and have a cup of er, brandy.

Jolly bad luck though, hope you´re over the trauma

David said...

The glass probably had a stress imbalance in the frame and gave up suddenly.


Possibly because it was depressed.

Anonymous said...

That's so bizarre. Maybe someone was gunning for you or your fellow bus-waiters and was just a bad shot?

Annie said...

Heather - indeed.

Em, how true. I should take it as a sign.

Greavsie - who doesn't have stress imbalance in London? We don't all go exploding all over the place, now do we?

Cheers, Destructor. Now you've given me a new paranoia.

Del said...

I'd contact your solicitor. Hello lawsuit! It's clear from what you've written that you're suffering mental anguish. Sue sue sue!

Anonymous said...

I think Adrian was trying to come up with something complimentary to women; had he made his claim [women cause glass to shatter] in a scientific tone with phrases like stress fracture, he might have got in some trouble...

Anonymous said...

I am sure glad you're ok. I had that happen to me and Peter Hill while riding on a bus to Romford our window just gave out - come to think of it why was I going to Romford? Horrid place. Hope nobody that reads this lives here but sorry - it's true.
Bad Sarah

Annie said...

Del, money money money, is that all you think about? (Now, where can I get hold of a shyster lawyer?)

QE - he can't help getting into trouble, that Adrian.

Sar, hope you weren't hurt, and glad it wasn't a sniper like Dan suggested, but a design flaw in public transport. Agreed on Romford - all the shared ownership places seem to be there...