Right, have decided to bite the bullet and go speed-dating. Am tired of spending Saturday nights watching TV on the sofa (especially rubbish as my old TV refuses to show anything but the 4 terrestrial channels) - I need to put myself through some kind of tortuous, anguished, hideous experience so that spending Saturday nights watching TV on the sofa will seem like a blessed relief.
I need good questions to sort out the sheep from the goats, the wheat from the chaff, the men from the boys. So far, all I've come up with is 'Are you circumcised?' *
I need your help with the good questions, people. Hit me...
* Just kidding.
About horses
2 days ago
16 comments:
This is like a round from Whose Line Is It Anyway?
So I suppose "If you really loved me, would you have plastic surgery to make yourself look like Tony Slattery?" would be a good start.
I tend to ask what they are reading at present because if the answer is that they prefer television to reading, I know we won't get on.
Although in reality you will find that all conversations go as follows:
Having a good time?
Giggles.
Done this before?
y/n
what do you think of it then?
"Beatles or Stones?"
"Football or rugby?"
If they give one word answers they're too serious.
Do you find the term 'Fiscal Stimulus' vaguely naughty?
Hmmmm. Just to amateur-psychologise, are you going speed-dating in order to give yourself the excuse that the dating pool in London is awful so you might as well not bother, eh, eh?
My friend/former boss recommended the question, "Are you an axe murderer?" She actually asked someone this when she was interviewing them for a job, and he immediately flew into an abusive rage signifying that yes, he probably was an axe murderer. So that sorted the wheat from the chaff.
good luck, m'dear.
The circumcision question is a valid one. The last thing you'd want is to fiddle about with cottage cheese in the height of passion.
Ask them if they own a freeview box.
Tim, ah, Tony Slattery. He always had a twinkle in his eye...
GSE - maybe I should cut to the chase with 'What do you think of the Da Vinci Code?'
Geoff - now if they actually WERE rugby players, they'd be ahead of the game - phwooar...
Greavsie - fiscal stimulus! *faints*
B - saw through my cunning plan. No really it's because I'm more likely to meet someone if I actually leave the house once in a while. HA! I love that story. Some people walk a very narrow line between sanity and insanity.
Rosie, thanks ducky.
Istvanski - good question. And, ewwww... *vows to remain celibate til death*
Um..Do you come here often?
Waitrose or Aldi?
Morecombe or Wise?
(And Istvanski - uuurrgghhhh!)
Where do you stand on 'the wet patch'?
Why is everyone suddenly obsessed with Morecambe and Wise? Is there something I should know?
Bedshaped - or perhaps, where do you lie on the wet patch?
What flavour Jam would you like to cover my reportedly nice arse with?
Raspberry. What? Sorry, what were we talking about?
Having done it, I found that "Tell me about yourself" was a good start. Put the ball in their court. Even if they're useless at describing themselves, they can do so in a charmingly endearing manner. Score.
Although I'm also a big fan of "How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?"
Rad, what do you mean 'reportedly'?
(See, this is what happens if I ever attempt to talk about serious world events, everyone flocks to comment on the post about speed-dating.)
Del, you did it???? What was it like? Where did you do it? BTW, I think 'tell me about yourself' is a particularly cruel question, having been on the receiving end. Instant mind-goes-blank.
Well I can only go by the anecdotal evidence Miss Slammers. ;)
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