I have broken Google. Or it has failed me, one or the other. I just typed in 'jobs for ex-teachers' - nothing, nada, zip. Nobody wants to employ us. (This is why they dump us in school, where no adult in their right mind wants to be. )
I tried subscribing to a jobs email, and am drawn to one which curiously no one seems to have applied for yet. The job involves working for something called 'Good Vibrations - Gamelan in Prisons.'
What else can I do? What?*
* Nothing that requires retraining. No no no. I have qualifications coming out of my ears, and the scars on my bank balance to prove it.
Oh, and tell me about your WORST job, to cheer me up.
About teaching and crying
1 day ago
18 comments:
I worked as the admin assistant at a recruitment agency that didn't place a candidate for the entire 18 months I was there. It was just mounting debt after mounting debt. About half my days were spent fending off debt collectors, the rest of the time was spent trying to stay out of the way of my lazy, arrogant, toothless, narcoleptic boss while he smoked in the office and made me go and buy his lunch.
I knew things were going to be bad when he ran past my office in my first week yelling, "I'm going to shit my pants!".
Oh dear, does this have something to do with your hideous day of hideousness?
Thanks, Anonymous. 'lazy, arrogant, toothless and narcoleptic' did cheer me up considerably. Good grief!
Yes P - it's my own fault though, I did choose it. And now upstairs neighbours have played Amy Winehouse's version of Valerie 15 times in a row, I counted. It's just one of those days.
I worked as a trainee car mechanic for a bloke that had a severe stutter.
We never did get around to fix many cars as most of the time was spent in conversation.
I'm feeling you babes. What ever you do don't go into costume. It'll break your spirit and erode your lifelong love of movies.
I just gave up my job last week as a night-stockist at Primark. They didn't tell me when I started that I'd have to take heavy deliveries for Christmas from the truck and stack the boxes up in the stock room. I have had a back problem ever since I had to use crutches for 3 months earlier this year. So I stuffed it. I'm officially unemployed now except that I'm giving private tuition to students of English. Jobs in this country suck, I read in the papers that the bulk of the jobs go to foreigners who can't speak a word of English. Mostly my fellow Indian and Pakistanis who I have seen living just to work, like donkeys -
Wish I could help in some way but Good Luck!
I clipped the rough parts off the mouldings of saucepan handles at a plastics factory. They were piled up in bins and trundled toward me on a conveyor belt. Trying to read a book at the same time didn't go down very well.
I once had a job as 'The Scary Lady' in a chamber of horrors. I had to let the kids in, hide, scream at children, run back to sit at dest before they came out and pretend I'd been there all the time, and would never ever scream at them.
Later I became a teacher. I had to let kids in, hide...
Am now an ex teacher too.
I was hired for a summer for a company called Wild N Wet in Canada where I grew up. I know what you're thinking - it wasn't that kind of company it was a water slide park. I had to stand at the top of the slide in the rushing water and open and close the barriers for the people so that they didn't slide into each other. I stood there and said "go", "go" for hours at a time. The only bonus was a had a great tan by the end of the summer and I had numerous phone numbers of life guards.. oh wait - maybe it wasn't so bad.
I know how you feel about retraining. I've recently had to accept that, if I want to do something else, I'm going to have to retrain. Although I also have a number of qualifications none, it would seem, is actually going to secure me a job.
My worst job ever? Three years in the, now defunct, Manpower Services Commission, helping the Thatcher government to massage the unemployment statistics.
What sort of thing would you like to do?
I tested dog piss for drugs at a greyhound stadium.
I did temp work at a company that processed special offers i.e. collect 10 foils from inside special offer marg tubs to get a money-off voucher. I lasted 3 days and grassed on them about a scam - they recruited via the Jobcentre for "data input clerks" and after 1 day they relegated the recruits to warehouse on a lower hourly wage. Huge turnover of staff. After the scam was revealed, the Jobcentre curtailed their advertising as the jobs available were not "as advertised".
I was a dustman for a day. My colleagues were Sid, Cyril and George, who told quite entertaining stories about how they'd felt the last fuckin' breff go out of their old men - all three with matching experiences - and talked quite a lot about masturbation. I was too weak to lift the bins.
I did double cleaning shifts once or twice. Fourteen hours mopping. The slowest days of my life.
DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, become a translator.
And I repeat Marsha's question. What sort of thing would you like to do? Do you have an idea or are you open to anything?
Geoff - I'd test anything too if they paid me with narcotics.
Ay ay ay. Thanks people, I really can't compete with your rotten jobs... only another 30 years to go... *sigh*
Marsha, & BiB, there are many, many things I'd prefer to do.(photographer, curator, graphic designer, shoemaker... all requiring major retraining and investment.) I have a vague plan to move into gallery/museum education but all the jobs seem to pay tuppence AND ask for an MA, to boot. Maybe I should take my daydream of moonlighting as a dominatrix seriously to fund a career change.
Darling, do. Moonlight as a dominatrix. Perhaps you could force one of your submissive types to make the shoes for you. Dominate elves is my advice.
I agree with BiB. If you're sure you have the temperamental strength and can provide yourself with a secure environment, seriously you could make a fortune.
I temped for a bit in Watford council, but that never felt that bad, because it was never for any length of time.
I guess the worst has to be working in a Newsagent as a teenager. Just dealing with the idiotic British public for 10 hours a day on a Saturday. Idiots who treated you like scum, and yet couldn't even perform basic addition. Or talk without hacking in my face.
Helped me develop a healthy contempt for the majority of stupid rude people in this world, but also made me appreciate the few polite, friendly people. Taught me to be nice to everyone, whatever they do.
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